


Hesitation Is For The Weak

by wadewilscns



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Adult Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Adult Richie Tozier, Awkward Kissing, Drinking, Drunk Sex, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Flirting, Drunken Kissing, Eddie Kaspbrak Lives, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier-centric, Fix-It, Friends to Lovers, I LOVE HIM A LOT, Kissing, M/M, Neck Kissing, Not Canon Compliant, Post-Pennywise (IT), Richie Tozier Being an Asshole, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Richie Tozier is His Own Warning, Richie Tozier is a Dork, Richie Tozier is a Little Shit, Tags Are Hard, Thighs, Tumblr Prompt, Why Did I Write This?, Will they or wont they?, but who cares, have i added too many tags??, i cant believe hes oblivious to eddie's obvious thirst, i dont know bro im just gonna keep tagging LMAO, it is 1am, richie and eddie are both so stupid, richie tozier is so fucking stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:41:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26909050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wadewilscns/pseuds/wadewilscns
Summary: Eddie’s phone began to buzz, but he ignored it. He opted out for placing his hand on Richie’s thigh, resulting in a sharp inhale from the other man. Richie’s jaw dropped lower, and he knew that he looked stupidly awestruck at this point, but he couldn’t control it. He had fallen under Eddie’s spell.“Eds,” Richie whispered, “You’re drunk. What do you want from me?”Eddie chuckled lightly in response. “Nothing.”Nothing. Despite Eddie’s hand on his thigh, for some reason, he wanted nothing from Richie. As peculiar as it was, it was slightly fitting for Eddie’s character; right as he drew you in, he let you go, dropping you into the abyss.“That’s bullshit,” Richie stuttered, his adrenaline spiking. “Whatever it is you want, you can have it.”“Anything?”“Anything.”----Everybody makes mistakes. For Richie and Eddie, they come in the form of excessive drinking and regrets.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 10
Kudos: 57





	Hesitation Is For The Weak

**Author's Note:**

> The last time I wrote a Reddie fic was in September of 2019. It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't to the standard that I would have preferred considering its age.
> 
> So I decided to write another! It's 1:30am, I've had way too much caffeine, and after begging three of my friends to beta read this, it's finally done.
> 
> While writing this, I told my friends that I was /really/ trying to capture the energy of this song: https://soundcloud.com/little-underscore/magnet-lizz-robinett-and-lollia-cover-repost
> 
> We tweaked the fic and pulled strings until my friends and I thought that the song and this writing had the same feeling. If you haven't heard the song, I really recommend it! :))
> 
> Enjoy! thank you to may, nik, and lee for your beta reading <3

All Eddie had to say was, “Your eyes are so beautiful,” and Richie was thrown for a loop.

Of course, Eddie didn’t mean for it to slip -- they were both drunk, after all -- and it was nothing but a mistake. Yes, just a drunken phrase that wouldn’t mean anything to them in the morning. Despite this, it made Richie’s stomach explode with the most marvelous of butterflies.

Richie wasn’t really sure when he had started loving Eddie. Perhaps it just began one day, like some sort of nuclear explosion, or maybe it had developed over the course of years without him knowing. Nonetheless, it confused the hell out of Richie.

As time went by, yearning -- no, craving -- turned to longing. Longing turned to wanting, wanting turned to needing. By the time that Eddie had finally recovered from his clown-induced injuries, all Richie wanted was to put his hands all over Eddie, soothe his wounds, kiss his scars away.

Or, maybe, it was just the booze talking. They somehow wound up at a bar together a few days after Eddie was discharged from the hospital. Despite his better judgement (you shouldn’t drink alcohol while recovering from an illness, you know,) Eddie had to drink something that would make him pass out. In all fairness, he deserved it; he was the one impaled by a monstrous clown, after all. Richie, never one to turn down a pint, accompanied him.

They talked back and forth at the bar counter for nearly an hour, ordering drink after drink, until their words became less coherent. Richie, of course, was a trashmouth, but the things Eddie was saying while under the influence were far more ridiculous than anything Richie could muster.

“Richie, your mom was so tight last night, oh my god,” Eddie murmured, his words so slurred that Richie could barely make them out. Despite this, all he could do was grin.

“Bro,” Richie managed to make out in between fits of laughter, “You know my mom’s dead, right?”

“Hey man, I flatlined in the hospital. I’ve been dead before. And, let me tell you this -- your mom’s angel tits were the best.”

They went back and forth for many minutes which felt like _hours _, and despite Richie being absolutely destroyed by Eddie’s playful roasts, he couldn’t help but hang onto Eddie’s every word like it _meant something _. His eyes frequently dropped down to Eddie’s lips, the way that they would curl when he said something he thought was funny, and the way that his legs would fidget when he would become excited. His arms trembled whenever their drunken discussions got _really _heated, and Richie was, to put it lightly, obsessed with Eddie’s demeanor.______

______Eddie was perfect in every way to Richie. He didn’t think that Eddie would ever feel the same, but it didn’t matter. He would be satisfied to the core just by being in his vicinity._ _ _ _ _ _

______At this point, Richie was nothing but dazed and confused. He was _there _, with Eddie, who _lived through a deadly impalation, _and they were together at a bar, alone. If Richie leaned forward and kissed Eddie, there would be no onlookers, minus the bartender who seemed too busy to care. He could do anything he wanted to Eddie, be anything he wanted with Eddie, without the fear of being considered repulsive. Sure, it was 2016 and the times were changing, but the clown was right. His sexual urges would always be his dirty little secret._____ _ _ _ _ _

__________So, when Eddie dropped the groundbreaking line of “Your eyes are so beautiful,” Richie thought he was dreaming._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________He must have been dreaming. There’s no way in _hell _that Eddie would ever reciprocate his feelings. Not only that, Eddie was married. And yet, those words took his breath away, like his chest had been stomped on and the wind was knocked out of him, or like all the oxygen in the room had suddenly been depleted and he was left struggling to breathe.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Say what?” he whispered, softer than he had intended. Perhaps too softly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Yeah, man, they’re nice. Too bad you wear those dorky glasses everywhere.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Richie chuckled to himself and set his cup down. He turned his bar stool slightly, to face Eddie properly. “You think I should go for contacts?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Eddie stopped for a moment, pondering Richie’s sentence. He appeared to be deep in thought, much to Richie’s surprise; according to Richie, Eddie was “unbelievably small brained”._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Learn forward,” Eddie spoke. And, like some sort of subordinate bitch, Richie did._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Suddenly, Eddie’s hands were reaching towards Richie’s face, and in that moment he could have _sworn _that all the blood in his body ran straight to his cheeks. Eddie tugged off Richie’s glasses, folding them into the back pocket of his pants.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“You’re stealing my glasses now, Eds? Real cute,” Richie managed to murmur in hopes to make the air around them less tense, and god, _was it getting hot in here?__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Shut up. Don’t speak.” Eddie took a good look at Richie’s face, looking like he was contemplating something. Richie swallowed hard._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Nah, I like the glasses. They fit your face,” Eddie decided, and he reluctantly returned Richie’s thick-rimmed glasses. As Richie accepted his frames back, their hands brushed for a split second, and _god damn, _if Richie didn’t feel like he was walking on cloud nine.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________“What makes you think that?” Richie replied, a bit softer than he had originally intended, and his remark resulted in Eddie rolling his eyes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________“You’ve been wearing them all your life. If you suddenly switched up on me and wore contacts, I think I’d faint.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________Eddie repositioned himself in his bar stool to face Richie completely._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________“What, you got a thing for eyes, Eds? That’s quite hot, if I do say so myself.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________“Shut up, dickwad!” Eddie commanded in response, playfully kicking Richie’s leg. Richie couldn’t help but giggle and take another sip from whatever drink he ordered._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________After basking in each other’s silence for a few moments, Richie finally decided to speak up._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________“You mean it? You think my eyes are sexy?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________“I never said sexy, you intolerant piece of shit,” Eddie sneered, “I said beautiful.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________Richie tried the word on his tongue a few times. _Beautiful. _That was something he’d never even dreamed of being called before. Maybe in his wet dreams Eddie had called him beautiful once or twice, but to hear it out loud was the best thing he could have prayed for.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________“Wonder what your wife would say, hearing you call someone beautiful.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________Eddie slammed his cup down on the bar counter. “Man, fuck my wife. I only married her because she reminded me of my mom.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________“Wow, Eddie Kaspbrak coming in like a fireball with the mommy issues?” Richie chuckled to himself, but it didn’t seem funny to Eddie. His lips were pressed into a line, much to Richie’s confusion._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________“I’m gay, Rich.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________Oh. _Oh. _____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“Gay?” Richie stuttered, and for some reason, that word was hard to make out. His knees were close to giving out on him, and against his better judgement, he decided to press on._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“Edward Kaspbrak, gay? Wow, I never would have guessed.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________Eddie took a glance at Richie, and then back at his own cup. His eyes were absolutely dead -- glassy and insincere. He looked more frightened than upset; the last time Richie had seen him like this, it was back when Eddie was flipping his shit in It’s lair, trying his best to put on a brave face but ultimately couldn’t._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“I need to go home now, Richie. To call my wife.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________Eddie stood up, slapping a few dollar bills on the counter to cover his drinks. He attempted to walk away, but ended up tripping over himself and nearly stumbling to the ground. It was purely juvenile behavior, earning a chuckle from Richie._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“Let me walk you home, man.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“You don’t even know where my motel is,” Eddie snapped back, struggling to get his phone out of his pocket. Richie watched him aimlessly tap the screen, trying (and failing) to get it unlocked. Richie plucked Eddie’s phone from his grasp, resulting in him groaning in annoyance._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“What’s the password to this thing?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“Fuck off, Richie.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________“You’re drunker than I am. I’m the only one who can unlock this for you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________Eddie rolled his eyes. “The password is ‘your mom’s tits’.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________Richie stared blankly at the keypad on the phone’s screen. Eddie’s password system could only be unlocked with a word punched into the keyboard, so Richie tried _‘your mom’s tits', _and of course, wasn’t shocked when it didn’t work.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Eddie chuckled gently. “Did you actually fucking try that password?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________“Hey, this is your loss,” Richie giggled, “Now I can tell everyone that you’re into old lady tits.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________“Oh, shoot yourself, Richie. The password is ‘blue3’. My reservation details are in the notes app.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Richie typed it in, and to his surprise, the phone unlocked. He swiped left until he reached Eddie’s ‘notes’ app, opening the one titled ‘reservation’. Eddie was staying at the Greenbrook motel, just down a couple blocks and to the left. Easy enough._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________The two exited the small bar together, Eddie leaning on to Richie for support. Despite Richie knowing that it was just a drunken action, and that Eddie had to stabilize himself _somehow _so that he could walk in a straight line, Eddie’s touch sent a shiver down Richie’s spine. He swallowed hard, keeping his eyes locked on the sidewalk ahead.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________Being taken back to _Eddie’s motel room? _Now this was definitely a dream. Although, he wasn’t technically being taken back, rather, he was just walking Eddie to the building. Nonetheless, it was everything he could have asked for and more.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________As they walked, Eddie stumbled slightly, nearly falling into the street a couple times as cars whizzed past._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________“Richie, you need to grab on to me man,” Eddie gasped after almost tripping off of the sidewalk, “Or I’ll end up as roadkill!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________“Hey, I’m drunk too! It’s not like I can help you!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________And Richie was right. He wasn’t seeing double in the same sense that Eddie was, but his reasoning and motor skills were slightly impared. If anything, he was the one unintentionally pushing Eddie into the direction of the street. Despite this, Eddie trusted him to walk him home safely, which puzzled Richie -- he wouldn’t even trust _himself _in a situation like this.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Nonetheless, he held onto Eddie’s forearm with a death grip, his knuckles nearly white. He had to try doing something properly, for once._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________When they arrived at Eddie’s building, Richie was politely thanked, and Eddie approached the entrance. He froze for a moment, turning back towards Richie._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“Why don’t you sober up a bit with me?” Eddie questioned, and Richie was positive that his startled expression was obvious._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“I mean,” Richie mumbled, trying to find the right words, “Okay. Maybe.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________The pair approached Eddie’s door together, and Richie giggled as the shorter man fumbled with the key. As they entered the room, Richie didn’t notice anything particularly extravagant; there was a single bed with a small lamp on the nightstand next to it, a door leading to the bathroom, a desk, and a small television._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie kicked off his shoes. “Make yourself at home, or whatever.” Richie left his boots next to the door and stepped inside, locking it behind him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Being in a room alone with Eddie felt surreal. Maybe it was just the alcohol talking, but he had wanted something like this for a while. Just him, Eddie, and a shared longing. He had brief thoughts cross his mind of pinning Eddie to the bed and kissing him right then and there, maybe slipping his hand up his shirt and caressing that scar tissue left behind from It’s talon, but he swallowed them down. Nothing could happen; Eddie was married. Unhappily married, but married nonetheless._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“Myra’s going to call me at some point. In that case, just shut up and say nothing.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie sat down on the bed, leaning over slightly to put his head in his hands. Richie followed suit, putting his jacket on the desk chair and sitting next to Eddie._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“Dude, I have a killer headache and I’m not even hungover yet,” Eddie whispered, groaning. Richie reached his hand over to touch the small of Eddie back, perhaps rub comforting circles into his shoulder blades, but ultimately decided against it. He had to learn how to resist his urges one way or another._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“There’s a bottle of water in my bag. Hand it to me,” Eddie commanded. Richie glanced around the room, discovering a small backpack next to Eddie’s suitcase. He pulled the plastic bottle out of the side pocket and placed it into Eddie’s trembling hands, which was quickly followed by Eddie snatching it and taking a long, desperate sip. Richie fiddled with his thumbs while Eddie drank, unable to ignore how awkward and out of place he felt._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie placed the bottle on the nightstand and turned to Richie. He locked eyes with him for a moment, a look of awe appearing on Eddie’s face out of the blue. Richie sharply inhaled and let his jaw drop slightly; Eddie hadn’t even said anything to him, and yet, he was still under his control._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie leaned forward, gently removing Richie’s glasses from his face. Neither of them spoke a word, and anticipation clinged to the air for dear life. Everything felt wrong, yet felt so right. Richie had no clue what Eddie was doing, nor what move Eddie would make next, and he basked in the thrill of it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie set his frames on the nightstand, not even turning away to stop staring deeply into Richie’s eyes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“I, uh,” Richie started, “Can’t see you without my glasses. You’re too close.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie delivered a scoff in response._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“You just never fucking shut up, do you?” he tried to exclaim, but it came out as more of a whisper, “Someone has to stitch that mouth of yours shut.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie’s phone began to buzz, but he ignored it. He opted out for placing his hand on Richie’s thigh, resulting in a sharp inhale from the other man. Richie’s jaw dropped lower, and he knew that he looked stupidly awestruck at this point, but he couldn’t control it. He had fallen under Eddie’s spell._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________“Eds,” Richie whispered, “You’re drunk. What do you want from me?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Eddie chuckled lightly in response. “Nothing.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________Nothing. Despite Eddie’s hand on his thigh, for some reason, he wanted _nothing _from Richie. As peculiar as it was, it was slightly fitting for Eddie’s character; right as he drew you in, he let you go, dropping you into the abyss.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“That’s bullshit,” Richie stuttered, his adrenaline spiking. “Whatever it is you want, you can have it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Anything?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Anything.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________In that moment, Eddie leaned forward, brushing his lips against Richie’s, and then pulling away. It was hardly a kiss, and perhaps could just be regarded as an accidental brush, but it was everything to Richie. He wanted more -- he wanted everything Eddie had to offer._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________He had no idea what had gotten into him, but he kissed Eddie back, much harder this time. Their teeth painfully clashed, and Eddie moaned in discomfort, but it felt right. To Richie, it felt like he was taking what he wanted; what he had dreamed for since he was just barely 13._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Eddie moved to face Richie properly, his hands travelling to Richie’s face, then shoulders, then hips. He slid his hands everywhere they wanted to go, feeling as much as he could through Richie’s clothes. Eventually, Richie’s urges kicked in, and he pushed Eddie against the pillows. At this point, he was nearly on top, his arms wrapped around Eddie like it was the last time they’d ever touch._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________It was electric, to say the least. It had felt like time stopped, and it was just them, messily kissing in a motel bed. It was wrong, as Eddie was married, but it felt so right, like they were two puzzle pieces that had finally clicked together. It was them, and only them, alone in the world, unleashing their pent-up sexual frustrations onto each other._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Eddie, against his better judgement, submitted. He let Richie pin him down, holding both of Richie’s hands above his head. He squeezed them until his knuckles were nearly white, which was obviously hurting Richie from his pained groans, but it didn’t matter to him in the moment. All that mattered was Richie’s tongue in his mouth, and that hard feeling against his thigh. Richie’s hard feeling against his thigh, specifically. He hated it and loved it at the same time, like a gambler despises the risk of rolling the dice but loves the rich rewards that come with winning._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“We need,” Eddie moaned in between sloppy kisses, “To talk about this.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Richie pulled away slightly, their foreheads still touching, but allowing them both enough room to produce coherent sentences._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Talk about what?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“The weather outside, obviously.” Eddie stated, a clear sarcastic tone in his voice. “No, dickwad, the fact that you’re on top of me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Can’t we do that in the morning?” Richie begged, not wanting the rush of the moment to fade._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“We can’t wait until tomorrow morning to talk about safe sex, you fucking Neanderthal.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Richie’s eyebrows shot up. “You... want to have sex?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Eddie rolled his eyes. “Do you want to guess?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________He took Richie’s hand in his and brought it down to his crotch. Richie could feel it quite clearly; Eddie was rock hard._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“I guess the answer is yes, then,” Richie whispered, his adrenaline starting to spike again, “You do want to have sex.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Eddie grinned. “God, Trashmouth, you’re so unbelievably clueless.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Richie chuckled. “What’s your point? I mean, where are we going with this?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Eddie shrugged his shoulders. “Nowhere too far. Unless we went out to a drug store and bought the proper materials, there’s no way to do this safely.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Fair,” Richie replied. He wasn’t disappointed; he was walking on cloud nine just by being able to touch Eddie like this. He still wasn’t sure whether or not he was dreaming at this point, but if he was, he silently prayed that he would never wake up._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Would you let me,” Richie started, his breath hitching mid sentence, “Take off your shirt?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“I mean, yeah. Go for it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Richie wasn’t really sure how to start. He’d never gotten this far with anyone, really, and just the mention of stripping someone made him uncomfortable._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Can you raise your arms?” He asked, and Eddie obliged. He gently slipped off his shirt, discarding it on the carpeted floor next to them._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Richie’s eyes trailed down Eddie’s bare chest. He had a silver necklace hanging from his neck, which Richie hadn’t noticed in the past. He took it in between his forefinger and thumb, twirling it gently and feeling it’s texture._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“Where did you get this?” Richie questioned, looking up at Eddie. Eddie groaned in response._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“It was something my mother bought me for my fourteenth birthday. Even after she died, I couldn’t let go of it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________He moved down to gaze upon Eddie’s abdomen, noticing the raggedy scar that had come from when he was impaled by one of It’s talons. Inhaling sharply, he brushed his fingertips along its crooked edges. He then moved to tenderly running his palm down it, feeling it in all of its glory._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________“It must feel uncomfortable when I do this,” Richie assumed, stopping his hand in its tracks, but Eddie shook his head ‘no’ in response._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________Richie reluctantly allowed himself to continue. He removed his shirt and discarded it on the floor, allowing Eddie easier access to touch him wherever he desired. He ran his hands everywhere on Eddie’s body, over the light freckles on his shoulders to his soft collarbones, all the way down to memorizing the feel of each of his knuckles and his gentle hands. Eddie was a flawed human being in regards to morals, that’s for sure, but every inch of him was perfect to Richie, and he couldn’t get enough of it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________At this point, neither of them were really sure about what _exactly _they wanted. They were both clearly horny, but at the same time, Eddie was married, and they didn’t want to take big steps too quickly. Despite this, simply _touching each other, _or whatever else they were doing, was working for them. They were winging it, and the product was passionate and satisfactory._____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________________Richie tried to speak, but Eddie stopped him, placing a finger over his mouth to silence him. Whatever they were getting at tonight, whatever they were planning on doing in the first place, was on its way; there was no reason to put it off for much longer. Both the best and the worst was yet to come, and they made no effort to combat against it. Journeying into the unknown was more thrilling._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________________Eddie leaned forward to kiss Richie’s neck, resulting in a soft moan from him. Richie repositioned himself so that he was sitting on Eddie’s lap, most likely accidentally crushing his thighs from the sheer weight. He wrapped his legs around Eddie, letting his head fall back from that pure pleasure of the sensitive spot on his neck being stimulated._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________________Eddie continued pressing his lips to Richie’s skin wherever he deemed suitable -- his jaw, his collarbones, down his sternum…. He had no plan and no apparent end goal, but he let his body move and simply sat back and watched where that vessel would take him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________________His hands free-roamed Richie’s body. He wasn’t really sure where they were going, but they were going somewhere -- definitely nowhere appropriate._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________________“You should, uh,” Eddie moaned, breaking their silence, “Take off your pants, I think.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________________“My pants?” Richie considered ‘take off your pants’ as something Eddie would never tell him. In his dreams he’s heard that phrase coming from Eddie’s mouth a few times, but _in person? _It was like the stars had perfectly aligned for the two of them to kiss in some random motel bed. It felt electrifying, the absolute power; they could do anything they wanted and nobody could stop them. It was something thirteen-year-old Richie would kill for.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________“I mean, yeah, ok,” Richie managed to make out, biting his lip to keep himself from almost _crying _in sheer bliss.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________Eddie playfully scoffed. “I’m about to take off your pants, and your only reaction is ‘yeah, okay’? You’re crazy.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________Eddie’s hands slid down Richie’s hips, ensuring that their eye contact didn’t break. Although he was quite physical when it came to affection, he’d rather stare into Richie’s eyes than look at what he was doing. He went to undo Richie’s belt, tossing it in some direction and pulling Richie in for another kiss. This one felt more genuine, like a release of all of the bottled up thoughts they’d had for each other over the course of decades. Decades, mind you, that felt like millenia._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________Richie tilted his head slightly to deepen the kiss, kicking off his pants in the process. When Eddie accidentally brushed his fingertips against his inner thigh to reach up to his hip, Richie couldn’t help but let out an obscene moan. As quickly as the movement came, it was gone; it covered him in goosebumps, knowing the power that Eddie had over him. He could take and give what he wanted, when he wanted, and Richie was sitting back and letting him do it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________He took Eddie’s hand in his and brought it to that spot again, burying his head into Eddie’s neck to hide the nearly pornographic look on his face. Eddie chuckled slightly, running his hand down Richie’s inner thigh. His movements were so tender and wanton, and they sent lightning bolts down Richie’s spine. He wanted more -- he wanted it all. _He wanted to take everything that Eddie had to offer and run with it. _____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________He wasn’t sure exactly what he wanted, but he knew that Eddie was going to deliver._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________Eddie moved to remove his own pants, struggling with it a bit from the alcohol in his system. Richie’s heart pounded; he had no idea what was coming next, but he knew he would love it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________They had to sit up and talk about this. They couldn’t keep going without knowing each other’s boundaries, what each of them liked, and what each of them disliked. They had to know if there were any special requests, or if they wanted to take it slowly or quickly. But, for some reason, they just had to rush into it, almost like there was a ticking time bomb going off; they only had so much time to prove their love to each other before the world caved in._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________They leaned in for another kiss -- this one much hungrier, almost _greedy _\-- and it felt like it was the right thing to do. Making each other feel _loved like this _was like reclaiming something that was missing; Perhaps, the memories that they could have made over the course of those decades of being apart. Making new memories, even if they might regret it in the morning once they were sober._____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Then, Eddie’s phone buzzed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Eddie pulled away for air, resting both of his hands on Richie’s chest. He tilted his head back for a moment, allowing himself ample room to fill the lungs that have been neglected for ages of kissing, and then he met Richie’s deep eyes again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“Should I take that?” He asked, the phone continuing to ring. Richie glanced over at it, then back at Eddie._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“Nah,” he answered._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Ignoring the chime of the phone, Richie planted kisses along Eddie’s jawline, then down his chest. Eddie let out a soft moan, and shakily ran a hand through Richie’s hair._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“What are you going to do?” Eddie asked, biting his lip._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Richie placed both of his hands on Eddie’s thighs, spreading them. “Dunno yet. I'm kind of winging it here, man.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Eddie chuckled. Richie was such a dork, even when he was in bed with someone._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________"Try to impress me, at least."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> cliffhanger? perhaps. ;)
> 
> kudos and comments are super duper appreciated! thanks so much for reading <3 <3


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